Thursday, October 13, 2011

Posting About Posting: The Good in "Good Enough"

I seem to have accidentally started writing about, um, writing because .  . . I can't afford to buy and review handbags every day? I have no idea, but if you're interested, there's more on the subject here and here. Oh, and here.

Not to name drop, but - let me go right ahead and do just that - at lunch yesterday with TUWABVB we chatted about how social media is good medicine for the recovering Type A's soul. There comes a time with any Tweet, email, or post in which you simply have to press that scary "PUBLISH" button and get on with the business of life (read: secretly catching up on the Kardashian wedding special) already:



For normal people, my guess is this must come with a sense of relief - "I'm done!" is how I imagine that inner dialogue might go. However, for those of us with pesky perfectionist tendencies - all lawyers, past, future, or present, please raise your hands here -  there's a sense of dread that comes with every "SEND" too. Once out of your controlling little hands, that post, Tweet, or email is just hanging out there, ripe for dissection or, worse, indifference.

There will be typos. Grammatical errors. Readers laying in wait to jump on your serial comma misuse. Jokes that only you find funny. Benign statements that get turned into arguments, and words thrust into your mouth that you never in a squillion years meant to utter. People who don't like you. Posts you read a few weeks or months later and wonder, "What on Earth was I thinking?"

That's the gamble we take in making ourselves vulnerable with this social media stuff, and also why I think it's a particularly good thing for the retired lawyer set - or this one, at any rate. Sometimes we will be wrong, or accidentally offensive, or (horrors) just not very good. Though I was once paid to argue what at times were, shall we say, wildly untenable positions, to be wrong or off-base here when it's *me* is a different beast, a daily exercise in letting go. We do our best, but at day's end we can only control our own actions.

It's a lesson I'm trying to take into my "real" life as well, on those days when I struggle to find the right balance between my different daily roles. On days like today, there will be areas when, to my Type A Minus Mind, I'm not getting it right. I haven't had time to exercise, the house is messy, I'm behind on boring household errands and email - but I am showered *and* in somewhat presentable clothes /hair/ makeup, and Master P is snoozing away after a happy morning playing with friends. To my former self, to have any of these pieces not fitting perfectly into the Ralph Lauren ad-style puzzle would be worrisome; in my New Normal, I'm slowly learning that it's ok. It isn't perfect, but it's good - even very, most days.

There is good in "good enough". Maybe if I keep repeating that, I'll eventually even believe it?

9 comments:

Tippy said...

I think you already believe it, my dear. And you wear your New Normal very, very well.

Danielle said...

I'm still trying to remind myself to say those words, let alone believe them. Overcoming perfectionism is no easy task and I commend anyone for even making baby steps. Good luck, I think admission is the first step to recovery.

LPC said...

There's a book, right? A business book? Perfect is the enemy of good? At a certain point no one has a better answer than you do. The sooner one gets there, the better.

Emily said...

Great post. You nailed how I feel anytime I post anything whether it has substance or not--a little bit of "here goes nothing" when I hit publish. It is always in my mind that anything I place on the internet is forever.

Sounds like you are doing great with your current role. Days that I am home with baby, dressed and ready before noon, are a big win in my book!

Meagan said...

Yes and Yes.
I always worry when I write an "opinion" piece and not just "here's pics and what we're doing" because it always leaves room for interpretation. And I've discovered that everyone is as self absorbed as I am and look for their own meaning in my writing-nothing I can do to stop that.
And yes, my house is a mess and for some unknown reason to this clean-freak, I don't care...

Jennifer said...

that publish button scares the hell outa me, which is the number one contributing factor to my lack of posting as of late.

however, in my working mommy home i live by the phrase good enough!

Crown + Castle said...

Catching up on blogging after a long break, and I must say, your posts are the most refreshing out there. Looking forward to reading more! Master P seems like such a fun little guy!

Adrienne said...

Great post! Your blog is so refreshing!

Laura said...

Isn't it funny how sometimes being type A forces a person to become everything but! Thanks for being relatable and a tremendously talented and entertaining writer :)

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