Featured Blogger Friday: "A Duck in Her Pond"

When I first clicked over to "A Duck and Her Pond" months ago, I confess I wasn't sure what to think. I had never seen a blog quite like it - it was (and is) an amalgamation of whimsical, ongoing stories that appeared to be children's fables, lighthearted personal remembrances, and scrumptious-looking recipes, all as presided over by one opinionated Chihuahua named Queen Bitty.

Intrigued, I continued to read, and The Pond quickly became one of my favorite reads, my daily dose of whimsy. The tales of Miranda, aka The Blond Duck, are childlike in the highest sense of the term, but she masterfully weaves in a greater, adult significance to each. If this lady doesn't get a children's book deal, the world is the poorer for it.

Plus, her blog design might be the most darling thing I've ever seen. And I'm secretly hoping that she'll teach me how to cook. And we both refer to you all as our "Invisible Friends". So, my Invisible Internet Friends, let's learn more about The Blond Duck:

What inspired her to start blogging:

Thanks! Honestly, the real answer is I'm a nerd. A little duckie nerd. Senior year of college, I stumbled across some popular blogs through the IVillage site and was hooked. I started my own blog a month after graduation and after I had written my first book, sure that some literary agent would recognize my brilliance, give me a large book deal so I'd never have to work in an office and would print whatever my crazy little mind spit out. I called myself the Blond Duck because I had a mild rubber duckie obsession in college, and wrote whimsical short stories about arguing birds, talking butterflies, and the GLUG, a Ginoumous Lime Green Unusual Gnat who landed on my husband's windshield one day and never left.

I wrote for about two years with just my parents and friends as readers. And then one dark January day at work, stuck in a dreadful job and disapointed that two books and several near-bites later that I was not published; I found Marie at A Year at Oak Cottage's blog. She had a fairy cake as her first post. Everything was pink and shiny and cheerful. I fell in love and left a comment babbling about how lovely she and her blog were. She left me an equally beaming comment and we became great friends. Through her, I met more and more food bloggers and suddenly my blog went from being read by my parents to ten people. Then twenty. Then many more.

The kindness and warm hearts of food bloggers and their children still make up a large part of my Invisible Friends today. While I had spent months visiting blogs and leaving comments, until Marie and my foodie Invisible Friends, everyone else thought I was an odd duck. Literally.

How she manages her daily posting schedule along with her journalism career:

I work as a writer for a major metropolitan newspaper in Texas. But I'm not a mean reporter--I do fun, fluffy features. I post in the mornings at 4:30 a.m. before I go work out and sometimes write as well in the evenings if my husband's working late. I post at least two or three days in advance--it works for me.

On weekends, I work on my novel(s) and submit short stories to contests. I just submitted a children's book to a contest and am about to submit another children's book to a few companies. I'm also working on printing a new book through Blond Duck press, an illustrated children's book.

I don't get out much, obviously.

(1) How she learned how to be such a good cook; and (2) (Pretty Note: This next question comes directly from the Anonymous Husband) Will she teach the Pretty how to cook?

Oh Pretty, you're so sweet. I'm not a fantastic chef. I follow recipes really well and have learned over time to adapt them. I wouldn't dare try to teach you how to truly cook--though if you'd like to learn how to fry chicken and bake a pie, I'm pretty good at that.

I started cooking in college, because I'm actually a secret health nut. I couldn't stand the idea of eating in the cafeteria or Wendy's every night after freshman year, and I got really burned out on PBJs and grilled cheeses. The idea of frozen dinners and pizzas made me want to hurl. Ben and I would create dinners together. I lost 25 lbs, while he gained 30.

And just in case you think I just picked up a recipe book and created brilliance in minutes, Ben can tell you all about the time I served a dinner party of ten raw fried chicken that was burned on the outside and frozen in the center, charred grilled cheeses, raw brownies from a box mix and burned canned soup. I burned CANNED soup, ya'll. Enough said.

So really, my cooking is really Darwin's survival theories at work.

Where she finds blogging inspiration:

I have no idea what inspires me to write my Never Ending Stories. I can tell you what inspired each one, but I never know what will inspire me. For example, Twirl was inspired by a story I did for work about a dancehall. Ben had offered to take me dancing there one evening, and I wrote a little short story. My Invisible Friends wanted more. So my little short story has turned into a mammoth Never Ending story. For the Gift, it was right after Christmas and I was wondering what would be in a box that would be a perfect present for any woman. And you'll get a kick out of this one, Pretty, the Coconut Queen was inspired because I decided one day I wanted to run for Mrs. Texas. Everyone ignored me. So I decided if I couldn't run, I'd write a story about someone who could. (Pretty Note: Attagirl - love it!)

As far as food posts go, it's whatever I find that's tasty. And for my random odes to things and hosting puppy balls and admitting to Chihuahua aerobics, I have no idea. I'll literally be daydreaming, think of something, scribble it down on one of the millions of Post it Notes that hold my life together and doodle along.

I couldn't live without post it notes. Mine are currently pink and heart shaped. (Pretty Note: Me neither! Mine are pink & green with wee alligators, courtesy of Mrs. News Readin'.)

Some hobbies outside of blogging:

I work out ALL the time--running and kickboxing and weight lifting. I dance every day, because I believe it's healthy for the soul. And before you think I'm an elegant ballerina, please note I flail about the living room giddily in clothes covered with peanut butter and dog hair in the most inelegant fashion possible. Although I did take dance for years and years. It was probably a big waste of money.

I also scrapbook and read everything I can get my hands on. One of these days, I want to try my hand at illustrating my books. I did a lot of art in high school, and I have a suspicion I left my art talent back in 2002.

Her goals for the next five years, both personally, professionally, and for the Pond:

Personally, in five years we'll probably be starting a family or have started one. Queen Bitty will be terrorizing everyone and Bear will be wuffling.

(Pretty Note: Behold Queen Bitty, puppy monarch on the right, and the wuffly Bear to the left)

I'm hoping to have established my children's writing career and be able have a good relationship with a publishing company. I also want to have printed several of my "bath tub books"--shorter novels for women that are whimsical stories that take them out of their every day routine. They would be short enough to read during a nice long bubble bath or a soccer game, but longer than a novella or short story.

As for my blog, I hope to have more Invisible Friends that enjoy visiting the Pond and reading my stories! I also hope to print several of my Never Ending stories into books through a printing service for those who enjoy reading off-screen.

The Blond Duck is a native Texan (originally from Austin!) living in Texas - is there anywhere else she & Mr. Duck would like to live?

The only other place I'd want to live is Colorado, and that's only in the summer. Maybe the beach when hurricane season wasn't in question. But you'd have to pry my cold cowboy boots out of this hard Texas dirt. Now Ben, or Mr. Duck, will go anywhere if you pay him enough and it's not unethical/ immoral/ the surface of the sun. If someone said, "Ben, I'd like you to live on this mountain in the middle of an ocean with only the Blond Duck, the babies and this warbling Wildebeast for company for a million dollars a year," he would do it. No matter how miserable I made him whining.

What she would want a new reader to know before clicking over to the Pond:

There are no bad days in the Pond--just sunshine, puppies, whimsy and magical stories with a extra big slice of pie. A la mode, of course.

Thanks for playing, Miranda! Everyone, please immediately run over to the Pond and say hello here.

Note: If you would also like the ginormously prestigious and world famous honor of being a Friday Feature blogger, please peruse my guidelines here and leave me a comment, including your email address. Thanks!

From Russia with Love

Things I've learned on my International Woman of Mystery travels, N. Europe 2009 ed., so far:

1) Do not promise your readers thrilling travel photos prior to ensuring that you'll actually have an internet connection swift enough to post said photos (read: Sorry! Will bore you with a few when I return because nothing says love like forcing others to look at your travel pics);

2) If you're feeling insecure about how blonde or healthy you look, I don't recommend Denmark. Once my self-esteem has recovered, I look forward to returning to that gorgeous place (land, people, buildings, beer, etc.) one day;

3) My patented Icy Glare of Judgment has nothing on the dour elderly women manning Russian museum exhibits. I'd take notes, but I'm completely terrified & just want to live to see the Hermitage;

4) When traveling with family, an open mind is good. An open bar is indispensable;

5) A little absence does make the heart grow fonder - missing you, interwebs & all of my Invisible Internet Friends!

Featured Blogger Friday: "Paisley Petunia"

(Pretty Note: If we're nice to these seriously Pretty ladies of Paisley Petunia, I'm hoping they will teach us how to look this good. Everyone, lots of comments & applause, please!)

I often natter on here about my beloved homeland, Southern California, and that certain sun-drenched joy of the people there. Today's featured bloggers, Christina and Stephanie of Paisley Petunia, embody that inimitable spirit. With their each & every post about the good life, be it about style, travel (Pretty Obnoxious Self-Promotion: like my guest post here), or good eats, these chic LA ladies remind me of that laid-back California glam I miss so very much.

I like these two so much, I won't even hold it against them that they aren't from San Diego, which is universally acknowledged as the true gem of Southern California. Without further ado, here are Miss Christina & Stephanie:

First off - we are so excited to be participating as a Friday Featured Blogger! Thank you I Pick Pretty for picking us.

What Inspired Them to Start Blogging:

C + S: We met while working together, and we were actually blogging before we were officially blogging because everyday we would send each other emails with links saying “oh did you see this?” “let’s try this restaurant!” “have you been to this vintage shop?” Each day was one long forwarded email between the two of us. We both read loads of blogs and then one night over margaritas and queso dip at our local Mexican dive bar, we finally took the plunge and thought of the name. It seemed like giving it a name made it real and got us fully invested. Christina bought the domain name from her Blackberry right then and there. The next day we were so excited (and a little nervous) as we plotted how to follow through from our tequila-aided decision.

C: I’ve been reading Melissa C Morris, Go Fug Yourself and PopSugar from way back in the day but it was Yelp! that really got me started looking for blogs and realizing how much I loved finding someone who I didn’t know but who’s opinion and suggestions were like nuggets of wisdom from a cool, new friend.

S: I also liked all the Sugarsites in the beginning and then started to discover the individual gems like Cup of Joe, Nie Nie Dialogues and Rockstar Diaries. I love getting lost for hours it seems like, linking from one blog to the next, seeing what people write, capture, find and create.

Their blogging inspirations - aside from living in LA, an inspiration unto itself:

S: Hmm besides LA? I am inspired by my friends and what they are doing to change the world. I am inspired by creative genius with food - at Paisley Petunia we love eating and we don't discriminate from In-N-Out to Korean BBQ Taco Trucks to Nancy Silverton and Spago. I am also inspired by talented photographers and clothing designers - two skills that I do not (yet) have but greatly admire + enjoy!

But really, this great urban sprawl provides me with a lot of inspiration. The people walking down the street here have amazing style that I try to emulate. I live in Venice and the beach is my reason for living here. It makes me happy each day. Venice is particularly eclectic and funky; you just never know what you are going to see at the coffee shop each morning. Some people don't like LA, and I can see why, but if you give it a chance, you can find a beautiful and interesting place with lots of opportunity and sunshine.

C: Inspiration other than LA…hmmm. That’s tough because LA is my inspiration for almost everything. But I love reading blogs that focus on creative DIY ideas particularly as they pertain to events and entertaining, such as A Lovely Morning, Eddie Ross and Girl Inspired.

I also love photography and design blogs because it never ceases to amaze me how many talented (discovered and undiscovered) people there are in the world. Two of my favorites are Pois Rouge and Nectar and Light.

I love food blogs too, since I’m always looking for something unusual to cook or for a new restaurant to try. I love Making Food- Eating Food and Orangette.

How they coordinate blogging schedules:

C: Ha ha, I laugh because initially we thought we would create a google editorial calendar and we would each plan out our month of posts. That lasted about a week.

I generally write about whatever pops into my head. Might be something I saw in my late night magazine reading or a conversation I overheard at Peet's or the never ending fashion show that is LA. Of course, there are some exceptions and we do try to help promote Paisley-approved organizations when they have events or news. I think the blog is still like a FW: FW: FW: email between C+ S, we love that we get to share it with other people but probably we would be doing exactly the same thing even if we weren’t blogging. (Pretty Note: This is part of what I like so much about their blog; it does feel like two friends having a chat.)

S: It's great having a blogger partner for many reasons - for those days when you are slammed at work, the other one can pick up for you and its great to have someone to bounce ideas off of. Shoot, I should have said above that I am inspired by Christina. She is great fun to blog with!

What are some of your hobbies outside of blogging?

C: I showed hunter-jumpers for the first 28 years of my life and when I finally hung up my Vogels, I realized I needed to find something to do with my new found free time. I discovered a love of entertaining and cooking; now gardening and photography have been added to the list. I also do a lot of work with animal rescue- helping to keep sad-homeless-scruffy dogs off the street. (Pretty Note: I will be your BFF if you all promise to get involved in animal rescue, right now.)

(Pretty Note: Look, it's a pony! In related news, I'm dying to learn how to jump like this - someday . . .)

S: My hobbies include going to the beach, riding my bike around town, hiking the nearby mountains, reading my book club book and trying new restaurants. I love bargain hunting (maybe I am kind of cheap, but who doesn't love a good sale?!) and vintage clothes shopping. My tailor is my other best friend.

Where they see themselves in 5 Years, both personally & for their blog:

C + S: This is a really good question and spurred a great conversation for us. We love our blog and are having so much fun. The interaction with readers is like the icing on the cake. In 5 years, we hope that that blog will have 5 years of titillating archives and will be a collection of things we loved, ate, saw, wore, liked and did. It will be a great online scrapbook really.

S: Personally, I am not sure where I will be - possibly moving back to my hometown of San Francisco?? Or maybe the sunshine and beach life have made me a permanent Venetian, not quite sure what the future holds. I hope to be happy and my life full of lots of adventure, love and really delicious food.

C: Oh sheep! That’s hard. Maybe…

• Finishing up my fourth season on the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, having brunch with Tim Gunn and Martha Stewart and sitting runway side for fashion week (totally kidding of course.) (Pretty Note: Commendable goal only if I'm invited to said brunch & runway.)
• Or maybe: on a ranch outside of Boulder with 10 dogs, 4 horses, 2 kids and a 5 acre organic farm? (not completely kidding about this one.)
• Or maybe still here in LA strolling around Bev Hills, eating at a different restaurant every week, throwing parties and blogging (this seems reasonable.)

But seriously, I do hope wherever I am I have started a small foundation that can give grants to neighborhood based organizations doing compassionate work for animals and senior citizens.

What they want a new reader to know about your site before clicking over:

C + S: We aren't trying to be mysterious with the C + S, we both just have really long names and thought it easier to abbreviate. You can call us Christina and Stephanie

Also, we never blog about something that we don’t actually enjoy, like or believe in. No pay for play and we plan on keeping it that way. Our readers are our friends (albeit virtual ones) and we want to be 100% authentic about we share with our friends.

And, we don’t like mean! We made it our mission to keep our blog happy and positive. People have enough negative in their real lives; we’re just a daily nip from the happy bottle.

(Pretty Note: Nodding my head in agreement with all of this.)

The top 3 reasons Southern California is better than everywhere else (not that we're biased):

1. The Weather, hands down. We get cranky when it gets below 68*

2. The Food (why do you think Angelenos are so obsessed with working out…too much good food to pass up!)

3. The location - we've got the Pacific Ocean, the Santa Monica Mountains, the whole crazy Hollywood thing, Bevery Hills and a blossoming downtown. It’s a huge place with so many cool neighborhoods to try. We have each been here for about 9 years and there is still so much to do (and blog about!)

Thanks, C and S! Readers, please go check out Paisley Petunia here. You can also follow Christina's Tweets here and Stephanie's here.

Note: If you would like the supremely, intergalactically prestigious honor of being a featured blogger, please check out my guidelines here. Please forgive me if it takes me a bit to get back to you. Thanks for your interest!

Gone Baltic

(Credit: Etsy seller Foundpaperco; I just love the look of old-fashioned airmail.)

PRETTY HEADQUARTERS TEMPORARY RELOCATION ANNOUNCEMENT

Remember this? My LePliage is packed*, my suitcase can almost close if I sit on it just right, and I'm finally off for a fabulous ten days cruising around Northern Europe. Yes, I realize that I'm a spoiled, fortunate lady to be able to say that. Happily, as my longtime readers know, I actively seek out opportunities to be spoiled. And, er, to travel.

*Thank you, readers, for resolving my carry-on travel tote dilemma.

This means that I will be doing my best to do things like see stuff and read as many trashy books and magazines as is humanly possible, versus my usual spending too much time on the interwebs posting & leaving you comments. I'm sure this poses a great hardship to you all, and I encourage you to take this sad news with as much of your customary grace as you can muster.

I will pop in here & on Twitter with any worthy travel photos, should I accidentally happen to take one of those. Also, Featured Blogger Friday will continue in my absence. These next two are simply wonderful, and completely different from one another, so I'm hoping you'll enjoy the variety. Please stop in and say hello to them.

Missing you already, darlings! See you the first week of August, when I'll return in a blaze of International Woman of Mystery glory for my one year Blogiversary, complete with giveaways and various other means of tricking you into reading my drivel.

The Husband Wish List

Due to this weekend's fashion infraction, I've decided it's wise to step away from the shopping for a time and focus on embarrassing myself via other means. Any other means. Seriously.

Hence, when I stumbled upon the hilarious Secret Life of Tova Darling's post here, a lightbulb went off in my head; for those of us who have been blogging for a time, you'll recognize this as that cunning little inner voice that whispers to you, "This is actually rather mortifying in real life, but gives me a blog post, so I may as well throw it to the interwebs." Like Tova, I too had penned a "wish list" of the qualities I wanted in my future husband, back sometime around my freshman year in college in my case, which I managed to dig up in my diary archive.

Is posting on a blog, already a self-indulgent endeavor, about a diary entry akin to a double dose of self-absorption? Er, probably. I like to think of it as an In-n-Out double-double; a cheesy ode to short-term thinking (or cardiac distress, as it were).

In any event, here is my Husband List. I realize this may look like an invented list at best, dolloped liberally with a dose of Smug Married, but in the interest of full disclosure I'm reproducing this exactly as I wrote it some 13 years ago, in the order I wrote it:

- Brown eyes

- Short brown hair

(Pretty Note: I blame these first two on my first childhood crush, which was collectively on the cast of "Menudo". Yes, that Saturday morning "Menudo" featuring none other than Ricky "Next stop, Gayville" Martin. Interestingly, these are two of only a few list traits the Anonymous Husband doesn't possess. *cue Smug Married moment* )

- Broad Shoulders

- Honest

(Pretty Note: I'd like to point out that "honesty" came FOURTH on my list, behind three physical traits. Yes, I've had my priorities straight for a long while now.)

- Loves his family

- Believer

- Chivalrous

- Ambitious

- Intelligent

- Funny/sarcastic

- Wants kids

- Well educated & loves learning

(Pretty Note: "Loves learning" = apparently I longed to marry an ABC After-School Special.)

- Loyal

- Likes animals

- 6'0 to 6'2 tall

(Pretty Note: Almost made it! Again, I know how to prioritize the really important stuff.)

- Patient

- Outgoing

- Gives a decent massage

(Pretty Note: Mind you, this was written during a more innocent time. If I knew then what I knew now, I'd replace this last one with "A terrific kisser etc. & willing to turn a blind eye to / underwrite my spa habit." In fact, this alone could replace 3/4 of the list.)

As ridiculous as this may look in retrospect, not only am I happy to have written this down somewhere, I'm kicking myself for not having consulted it during the years of dating brown-eyed men (sadly, no "Menudo" cast members) who were otherwise sorely lacking in the List department.

Has anyone else written one of these? Care to share?

The Empress Has No Clothes - And You Should See Her Shoes

I am a hypocrite.

I don't mean that in the sense of the little white lies and pleasantries we (in the royal "We" sense of the term) tell ourselves to get through the day. I mean it in the sense of encouraging you to avoid certain life catastrophes, while I barrel headfirst towards the same.

I should have known better. I shouldn't have headed to the mall after a frustrating week at work, tired and cranky and with a grumbling tummy. Just like going to the grocery store on an empty stomach, such a journey is destined to end badly.

And so it was last Friday afternoon, when I fell prey to the lure of the shoe department and a smoothly charming salesman who caught a whiff of my Eau de Annoyance and struck accordingly. As if in a dream, I found myself handing over my credit card, uncertain yet chanting inwardly, "I am fierce, I am fashion forward, I am . . ."

. . . a disco gladiator diva?!?"

Sigh. WHERE to begin with the problems in this photo . . .

1) My Fashion Fatwah on all things gladiator or gladiator inspired (with limited exceptions, but not this one);

2) Combining multiple trends - metallic! cork platforms! gladiator straps! exposed zippers! - all in one gilded package, hence shortening an already wee trend shelf life;

3) Paying full retail for a trendy item; these utterly fail the Price Per Wear Test;

4) This is money that could be spent for a good cause, like this or other vitally important matters like the "splurge", classic heels I am saving up to buy.

I mean, I'm a shift-wearing, lady lawyering member of the Junior League, forchrissakes. While that doesn't de facto doom me to a life of sensible twinsets - a girl needs to step outside of her fashion boundaries every now and again - it does mean that this is exactly the type of look that would wear me, and not the other way around. Some of you could and should pull this look off without a second thought, whereas I would attempt it & inevitably feel awkward the entire night. Self-conscious isn't a good look no matter what the shoe.

So back to Nordstrom I went, retail tail between my legs, to return the shoes. I'd say that I've learned my lesson & won't be issuing Fashion Fatwahs again, but we all know that's ridiculous because being judgmental is too fun. Besides, what fun are these fashion rules if we can't break them every now and again? I just won't do it at the expense of the PPW Test - nor will I shop again without a nap & a snack first, because I'm apparently no more than an overgrown kindergartner with an AmEx.

Feel free to flog me in the comments for flouting my own standards*. Can you forgive me, darlings?

*As well as for assaulting you with alliteration. And assonance, as it turns out. "Assonance" - heh heh heh.

Featured Blogger Friday: "When Pigs Fly"

For those of you who are fed up with Fraulein Frivolous here, you are in for a treat today - I present you with a new Featured Blogger of actual substance, "Snowbound" of When Pigs Fly!  As such, I have absolutely no idea why she's been reading my drivel, but I'm so happy she is.  Through her witty comments here, I discovered her candid posts on a variety of media and pop culture topics dear to my heart such as the cougar phenomenon.

In addition to her funny, frank writing, she shares one of my favorite hobbies - horseback riding.  Yes, pets, it really is as simple as a pony photo sometimes.  (Not that I'm simple.) (Although I probably am.) (Quiet, you!) And before I once again drive home my simpleton status, let's get to the Featured Blogger business of the day:

Why She Got into Blogging:  I have always been interested in writing.  About a year ago, I was reading a "New York Times" article about bloggers and those who have started making a living at it.  I found it fascinating that strangers followed the minutiae of other people's everyday lives, and even more intriguing that individuals were making a living out of it. 

I decided to give it a go on a whim and see what kind of response I got.  So far, it has been almost entirely positive.

Her Blogging Inspirations:   I look for inspiration in the news.  The truth is stranger than fiction, and some really good material surfaces from everyday life.  I've become a regular reader of various online dailies such as Slate, Salon, and the Huffington Post.  You would also be amazed what great material "The Today Show" generates.

I also frequent my favorite individual blogs (Pretty Note:  Pinky swear, I didn't insert this line) such as yours, of course, along with some others that continually make me laugh:  Blunt Delivery, Bernthis, and Zelzee.  

Her one minute description of her blog:  My blog attempts to find humor in the absurdities of everyday life.  I perpetually find the media entertaining.  I have written about such things as the Octomom and Perez Hilton - i.e., the media creating a story and milking the life out of it.  

I always hope to generate some amount of commentary from my posts, no matter the subject. However, I do retain a certain degree of anonymity.  No one needs to know the gritty, personal details of my life.

Her hobbies outside of blogging:  (Pretty Note:  Ponies!!!) I'm an avid horse owner and rider.  I have two mares with which I compete in dressage.  For those of you who don't know equine sports, dressage is a sport in which horse and rider compete, riding various movements around on the ground (versus over a jump).  It is kind of like the ballet of the horse world.

While riding, I keep myself outfitted in monogrammed everything, along with matching breeches and vests.  As Billy Crystal once said, "It is better to look good than to feel good." (Pretty Note:  Somebody, please, stitch this on a pillow for me!)  In my world, it is better to look good than to ride well.  Not all of us can be Olympians.

(Pretty Note:  This is an incredibly difficult style of riding, and an elegant one to watch)

I also enjoy cooking and spent some time at Le Cordon Bleu while living in London.  I have taken to trolling a few culinary sites these days in lieu of actually baking.  Like for most of us, the recipes keep piling up, but the dishes never seem to get made.

Her goals for her blog over the next five years:  I would love to see my blog gain some traction & enable me to get published in some form.  The blog began on a lark, but it has become more than just a creative outlet.  I realize that there are millions of blogs out there and breaking into the mainstream is difficult, if not impossible.  I'm going to just keep plugging along & see what happens.

What she would want a new reader to know before clicking over to her blog:   There is a certain degree of honesty with my posts.  Basically, I tell it like I see it.

This got me into a bit of trouble recently when I wrote about my dismay over a post written by a certain famous mommy blogger (Pretty Note:  Identifying mommy blogger details retracted here by me & with Snowbound's OK.  I don't need the fringe Mommy Mafia warriors coming after me.  Moreover, I'm a chicken. Thank you for your understanding).  My post got picked up by a popular blogging website and generated an amazing amount of hate comments.  

I've since found that there are just some topics not worth touching.  I continue to be honest and humorous, but just a little more discerning about my subject matter.  In the end, I just want people to think, smile, and be entertained.

You can find a few of my favorite posts here, here and there.  

Darlings, please rush over immediately to When Pigs Fly and say hello!

Note:  If you are interested in being a Feature Friday blogger, please look over my wildly entertaining guidelines here, and leave me a comment on that post (including your email address).  Forgive me if it takes me a bit to get back to you; I have a number of stupendously talented bloggers already signed up, but I will be in touch.

Finding the Basics: Cocktail Dress Ed., Vol. 1

"Why not be one's self?  That is the whole secret of a successful appearance.  If one is a greyhound, why try to look like a Pekinese?" - Edith Sitwell (as pilfered from Tim Gunn's book, just because)

Back to our "splurge vs. save" list we recently worked on, let's work through those basic wardrobe items we each should have in our closet.  First up in this Pretty series is the go-to cocktail dress, which I argue is worth buying in the best quality that you can actually afford.  This is too weighty a subject to cover in one mere post - or was my ambition to write such a post derailed by the arrival of my "Mad Men" season 2 DVDs last night??? - so I'm going to touch on the basic dress today & move along to some other greats and accessorizing the next.

Ideally, the go-to cocktail dress can take you from work (in a professional environment, that is, as covered by a cardigan and daytime accessorized as appropriate), to an after-work party, to a dressier date, or to a semi-formal wedding.  For those of us residing in the more traditional bit of the US (read:  Texas or the South), I'll argue that this dress should neither be in black nor white for purposes of attending a wedding, where that is Just Not Done in certain circles, but I'll include my current LBD faves below.

For purposes of a go-to dress that will last you beyond the season - oh-so-important particularly now in These Difficult Times - I'm a fan of buying something in a very basic cut and pattern (or lack thereof).  If you get a classic enough silhouette, in a color unlikely to go out the next season (ie, not chartreuse), you can make it current or dress it up or down with your accessories (again, more on the accessorizing bit the next time).

Just to get the conversation started - again, my breaking this up into parts has nothing whatsoever with my writing life being derailed by a certain DVD set - here are some examples (all images credit to Chickdowntown unless otherwise noted):

Black Halo "Keyhole Ruffle Sheath":  In a color & lightweight blend material that would work for most seasons, this is a dress that could easily be dressed up or down; picture it with a blazer and conservative chemise underneath for work, for example.  More from this designer in a minute; as SLynnRo recently noted, this line has been everywhere lately and rightly so.

And on a related, recessionista note, look at what I found over at - I know, I know - Forever 21:

Forever 21 "Evangeline Dress":  Awfully similar for a literal fraction of the price - if you can bear to walk into the store, that is (as I always recommend you do, vs. ordering online, to assess the quality of this type of budget find).  This au courant grey both works for this fall, but isn't so trendy that you would have to replace it soon thereafter.

My two, Santa-please-bring-these-early LBD favorites, which I will try to bargain hunt for you once I get through these Season 2 DVDs again:

Black Halo "Maureen" Dress, probably the most classic, likely to last cut of all of these, and:

Black Halo "Jackie O." Dress (also available in to-die-for scarlet).

What do you think so far - any requests for Volume 2?   

How to Infiltrate Your Significant Other's Wardrobe

Alternate Titles:  "How to Tell if Your Husband is Reading Your Blog" and "The One Thing Tim Gunn's Book Won't Tell You"

Step 1:  Observe the style snags in your SO's closet.  In the Pretty household, my otherwise darling, Banana Republican sort of husband has sported the same tattered jeans and chino shorts (and not in that luxe, "I just walked off a Ralph Lauren ad set" way) since approx. 1996, resisting all attempts to change the same.

Step 2:  Steathily & casually drop into the conversation how his Friend X had a nice pair of jeans on at dinner that night; observe SO for signs of panic.

Step 3: If no signs of panic observed in Step 3 - or the complaining is kept to a minimal "This doesn't mean I have to go shopping, does it?" -  secretly purchase proper jeans and shorts on your own.

Step 4: One night, confuse your SO by acts of domestic felicity.  In my household, this equated to my offering the AH a drink upon his arriving home, making dinner AND doing the dishes afterwards.  Yes, I am still awaiting my medal.*

*Which I imagine comes in the form of diamond stud earrings.  Emphasis on imagine.

Step 5:  Only after completing Step 4, oh-so-casually say that you popped into the store for a great sale (truth of store and sale entirely optional) & felt like spoiling him.  Before he thinks you've purchased Megan F**ox for him on layaway, follow this up by saying the next best thing (to him):  "Oh, I've already put them away in your closet.  Let me know what you think."  

Step 6:  After he tries on the clothes, lavish praise on how clever he was to pick them out - again, sprinkle this speech liberally with as much fiction as required - and the many splendors of his posterior in those pants, etc.  Enjoy!

(Credit:  Macy's)

(And a preptastic pair of Seersucker shorts from here)

Voila!  And - show of hands - does this actually take anyone else 6 steps?

***

Thank you all for your thoughts about my blog question yesterday.  By virtue of my being far too lazy to keep up two blogs popular demand, I will be keeping all manner of nonsense here.  

That being said, I also hope to be doing some guest posts in the near future with some very talented bloggers here.  These posts may entail more of the same nonsense, or something necessitating a different voice or more "colorful language" as my late, great Grandmother may have put it.  In any event, I'll be sure to link here when I have something up there.

The Pretty Style Bookshelf

Pets, I'm all out of substance after yesterday's post - let's return to the State of Superficial, shall we?

We talked about coming up with a clothing "splurge vs. save list" recently, which got me thinking more about how to build a wardrobe based on what is both flattering & largely designed to last beyond one season.  That sounds a bit obvious, but again, given These Difficult Times blah blah blah, I'm trying to focus even more on my Grandmother's mantra "Buy less, but better" instead of just purchasing what is merely on sale or en vogue.

To that end, I've consulted my bookshelf to consult those who actually know something about the matter, unlike this boring lawyer.  By a book's very nature, it won't be able to cover the fleeting fashions like a magazine or the 'net can, but the right one can be invaluable in creating a lasting style.  Here are a few nuts-and-bolts reads I've found both useful and just fun to look at over the years (all images credit to Amazon):

"What You Wear Can Change Your Life" by Trinny Woodall and Susannah Constantine. Don't be put off by the grandiose title - one, because I assume you wouldn't be reading this blog if you were a stranger to hyperbole; and two, because these two are spot-on with their advice on how to dress for your figure & complexion.  The latter is something that is frequently overlooked by the glossies, which irritates me to no end; obviously part of building a lasting wardrobe is finding the cuts and colors that actually work on you, and not just throwing on the latest trend.

Also, Trinny & Susannah's hysterical BBC show "What Not to Wear" is far superior to the American version, if you're a fan of style TV.

"InStyle Secrets of Style": I like this one for seeing outfits in action on celebrities, as well as their wardrobe basics approach. Some styles are dated, but the underlying content is good.

"Style" by Kate Spade: I'm not the KS aficionado like I once was, but on my more preptastic days, I love the retro illustrations, quotes, and traditional style advice.

"A Guide to Quality, Taste & Style" by Tim Gunn:  I'm going to confess something shocking to you . . . this book is winging its way to me just now, so I can't vouch for it yet.   Forgive me, Fantasy GBFF Tim Gunn, for I can't comprehend how I've survived without your sage advice until this point.  Two penalty shifts at "Mood" for me, at a minimum.

Per my International Woman of Mystery duties, I have a few long plane rides in my near future - any other style reads you would recommend?

***

Darlings, I'd love your input on something - I'm considering moving my more personal posts elsewhere;  I enjoy writing those just as much as I do these Pretty posts, but I'm uncertain whether the two belong in the same space.  Do you like reading a bit of each here?

Please don't worry about hurting my feelings - I drowned those in a vat of Veuve long ago.  (I mean that) (sort of) (so long as you're polite) (because I'm like the Chinese government when it comes to comments, except with better accessories) (parentheses).  Thanks for your thoughts!

Edited to add: On a second read-through, it looks like I'm trolling for compliments here.  I'm not, truly. I will let you know, decisively, flagrantly, and none too subtly when I'm in search of flattery.  Which is the vast majority of the time, but not now.