Gone Beachy

(Credit: Wikimedia)

Pretty HQ hereby announces our temporary New Year's relocation & our wishes for a glorious holiday season to all. During this time, please send any correspondence or restorative beverages (with emphasis on the latter) to me via the swim-up bar in _________ . . .

Merry, Merry!

May you have time with loved ones this season & find sweet treats under your Christmas tree/ Hannukah bush/ Festivus pole such as these (with our without a certain attention-strumpeting Pug who inserts himself into all photos celebrity-style).

Christmas Giveaway Winner!

I'm breaking briefly from being generally Chrismassy as well as being sucked in to the "Twilight" series because, as you all have heard far too much about lately, HOLY CRAP THESE BOOKS ARE SO FREAKING ADDICTIVE AND I FEEL LIKE A RIDICULOUS 13-YEAR-OLD HORMONAL TEENAGER READING THEM BUT THEY ARE JUST SO COMPELLING AND I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M ADMITTING THIS TO THE INTERWEBS BUT I'VE BEEN REDUCED TO THIS LEVEL BY FICTIONAL TEENAGED VAMPIRES AND I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW HORRIFIED MY INNER ENGLISH TEACHER/LIT MINOR IS ABOUT THIS BUT SURELY I'M BEYOND THE POINT OF PRIDE HERE AND WHENEVER WILL I ACTUALLY GET ON A BANDWAGON IN A TIMELY MANNER BECAUSE HERE I AM LATE TO THE DANCE AS USUAL???

(Credit: Certainly not my dignity. Maybe Bookswim?)

Ahem. ((waving royal sceptre to summon customary feminine decorum))

My point was . . . right, was to bring you the winners of my pay-it-forward style Christmas Challenge, originally brought to you by the lovely News Readin Wife. Readers, I had a suspicion of how tremendous you were already, your commenting here being one of many indications of your good taste and style, but I was so struck by the thoughtfulness and passion behind your comments. Selfishly, it makes me happy to know there are such giving people in the world, and, come to think, the world is probably pretty pleased about it too.

So without further ado, the two winners as selected completely at random by one of those random integer thingies, are . . .

- My bloggy friend & fellow lover of all things Italian and "The Office" (what a combo, eh?), Miss Shabby Princess, on behalf of the SPCA of Texas. As a lifelong animal lover, I am ten sorts of excited to be able to donate to this fine organization.

- Pretty newcomer Airplane, on behalf of the American Cancer Society. Again, this is a cause close to my personally; I too lost a grandparent to cancer, so I am again excited at the opportunity to give to them.

To the winners: I will email you later tonight to discuss donor name details and such, and I ask that you continue this "pay it forward" concept in whichever manner you like. To all, thank you again for your generosity, and a merry merry holiday season. I'm off to spend even more time with the Undead . . .

The Texas Chronicles: Ranch Weekend

I'm off running about, so please forgive the lack of scenery in this post . . .

Said running about is due in part to the Anonymous Husband & I leaving tonight for a weekend at our friends' ranch in Texas wine country (Yes, Texas wine country - not a typo. An oxymoron to many, but more would be forced to acknowledge the quiet beauty of the place.)

The concept of a weekend home is a bit foreign to this Southern Californian. Not that I'm at all opposed to the concept - in fact, I imagine I could adapt rather quickly to, say, an Amalfi Coast villa or Aspen ski chalet (work hard, AH!). It's just that, back home on the Left Coast, there's a presumption that one is ALREADY living in a state of permanent vacation, hence there is less of an emphasis on wanting to escape anywhere. This may or may not be related to the exorbitant price one pays there simply to own one postage-stamp sized lot alone.

Elsewhere in the US, this second "country" home thing seems a bit more of a thing to do amongst A Certain (recession proof) Set. I read tales of New Yorkers going for weekends in Whichever Hampton or Connecticut, and southeasterners headed to various nearby islands. In Texas, the house to have appears to be the ranch - from what I can tell, the more land and the more family history involved, the better, and cattle and horses are not optional (although the knowledge of what to personally do with cows & ponies is.)

All faux sociological observations aside, I (not recession proof) am hugely grateful for the getaway opportunity and looking forward to a weekend of seeing friends (ie, trying to wheedle someone into letting me ride his/her horse.) If only I knew what I'm supposed to bring to these things as a hostess gift - a 12 pack of Shiner? A hunting rifle, even though I'm admittedly and firmly on the animals' side of that particular endeavor?

Proper pics to come . . . In the meantime, I'm off to hide from the Internet and these unceasing sale emails. Happy weekend to all . . .

But Back to the Fashion - Banana Republic

So enough about reading and Doing Good Deeds already - although if anyone else would like to enter my super-Cali-fragi-awesome charitable giveaway here, the Universe and I would do a most undignified happy dance - let's talk about fashion again for a bit.

Speaking of the Universe, it has apparently opted to put EVERYTHING on sale this week, to the delight of me last minute shoppers everywhere. One of my old favorites, Banana Republic, came up with a 60% off sale today. While my own personal spending on me is at a temporary halt, in my bloggerific dedication to you, I sauntered over to the virtual sale rack and found goodies worthy of our, ahem, your, attentions:




Going counterclockwise from the top left . . .

• BR Monogram Color-Block Sweater Dress: Down from $225 to the eminently more reasonable $145. I've been stalking this one for a while. Hmm . . .
  
• Lace Lady Dress: From $175 to $119.99. No, I don't just like it for the prim name, although I can't blame you for thinking it. Love the fun take on lace, which is trendy but also to us traditional sorts happens to be a classic.
• BR Monogram Princess Sleeve Collection: Maybe we should rename this post "The Prim and Properly Elegant Dress Post" or something. Regardless, love this for daytime & the more reasonable new price, $150 $149.99 down from $175.
• BR Monogram Chain Detail Dress: So perfect for a formal work setting with a little cardigan. From $195 to $125.
• BR Monogram Faille Sheath Dress: Love the origami-like detail at the waist. And the model's fierce look. Great price drop here - from $225 to $129.99.

And let's look at the accessories section:




Again, starting in the upper left corner:

• Angora Argyle Trouser Sock: As HRH Preppy Princess pointed out, BR has some adorable argyle right now. As longtime readers will note, I'm slowly coming around to the 'gyle . . . except that I've also become inexplicably lame and started writing stuff like " 'gyle" . . . in any event, these are down from $9.50 to $5.99.
• Winnifred Cutout Ballet Flat: Such a cute basic for spring! Or for when the insane Texas weather swings to 75 mid-December! Exclamation point! Now $39.99, from $79.00.
• Drake Quilted Shoulder Bag: Great trendy chain detail, but in a ladylike enough form to make me happy. Tres on sale, from $230 to $139.99.
• Floral Scarf: one of those frippy lightweight scarves us warm-weather Texans can occasionally use; from $69.00 to $39.99

Goodnight, pets - back to reading that addictive "Twilight" book, er, solving the fiscal crisis . . .

A Christmas Challenge, Vampires Welcome

How's that for a tortured title, huh? You literary, vampire-centric voters have spoken - giving excellent suggestions, I might add - so I will start my vacation reading off with a "Twilight" purchase and proceed on from there. Thanks to you, and the Undead, for the tips.

On a perhaps ever-so-slightly more Christmassy note, the ever-funny and fabulous News Readin Wife posted a moving message here the other day. Despite my constitutional aversion to forwards, be they emailed, blogged, or carrier pigeoned, this one passes my ever-judgmental test, so in the spirit of Christmas it is. The idea: In the spirit o' the holidays, I do (or attempt to do) something nice without expectation of getting anything in return - didn't Kevin Spacey do a movie about this? - but with the expectation that selected readers will, in turn, do something selflessly nice yourselves.

In my own personal version of this "pay it forward" - I know, how strange is this that I'm being all chipper and stuff? - I'd like to pay homage to my late, uber-wonderful Grandmother, who I am sorely missing this first Christmas season after her passing. All snark aside, it has been a difficult few weeks, and my reliance on the sweet relief of the Pity Party has been great lately. In any event, Grandmother was a great believer in charitable giving, so I've adapted the concept like so - I will randomly select two readers on whose behalf I will make one small (ie, no tax benefit to moi) donation, in an amount determined by me, directly to the charity of his or her choice. By "charity", I mean:

- If in the United States, a 501(c)(3) not-for-profit organization registered as a charity with the IRS as such, ie, "American Red Cross", "Junior League of Houston", etc. whose official, hoity-toity government sanctioned status can be verified by me. Unfortunately, I cannot support your "Please Pay My Student Loans" personal charity because I'm working on one of my own by that same title. If you're not in the US, er . . . we'll figure something out.

- Lurkers (and vampires!) are welcome to participate, but I reserve the right to eliminate any spammy or suspicious, Nigerian Pyramid Scheme-looking comments. Actually, this is just a Pretty Blog Rule in general, so, ya know, please take note.

- You must post a comment containing (1) your charity of choice; and (2) a means for me to contact you by, whether it be via your blog or email, so that we can discuss in whose name to make the donation, etc. I will enter you twice if you include (1) the reason why you're nominating that particular charity; and/or (2) gratuitous and wildly unreasonable compliments for yours truly.

- Other stuff I've forgotten, but I'm sure you clever readers will point out. I reserve the right to arbitrarily and unreasonably change these rules in my sole discretion.

- Comments will be left open until this Sunday, December 20th at 10 pm-ish, by which time I hope to have learned how to close comments. I will pick the two winners at random & announce the results shortly thereafter, and ask that they then return the favor by doing something they consider in line with this "pay it forward" concept and write about it.

I'm very curious what sort of turnout we'll get, since this isn't the traditional sort of giveaway . . . in any event, best of luck!

On the Pretty Bookshelf . . .

It's been a while since we've discussed my reading habit, which has recently included such choice, ahem, literature as Miss Tori Spelling's personal memoir? As I've noted before, reading is perhaps my one redeeming quality - one that comes naturally, rather, unlike Hateful Exercise and the other stuff we do because That's What Grown-Ups Do. Bleurgh.

As I prepare for the upcoming Pretty Headquarters Temporary Relocation - swim-up bar ahoy! - I find myself in need of some quality vacation reading material. After all, one cannot survive on "US Weekly" "The Economist" and "Vogue" "Harvard Business Review" alone. This is where you, Gentle (or Un-Gentle; we're feeling rather magnanimous today) Readers, come in. I'll show you what I'm reading now, in hopes that you'll also share what's on your nightstand (to sorta rip off the music theme that SLynnRo recently did - thanks, and let me know if you still want the Tori book!) Sort of like a glamorous virtual book club, absent the catty gossip and political chicanery. Come to think, must find myself a book club in my new town here . . .

In any event, here's what's on my current reading list, which may as well be titled "Once Again, Pretty Is a Giant Anglophile and Who'd Rather Be Swanning Around an Imaginary Tea Party and Faking a Terrible Accent in Manner of Madonna or Gwyneth" - classify that, Dewey Decimal System! Ahem:

(Credit: Barnes & Noble)

The trickest Austen of all, in my rarely to be humble opinion, and surely the one with the most horrid movie adaptations. No, I'm not just saying that I'm reading this to make up for the Tori Spelling bit.

(Credit: Barnes & Noble)

Thanks to my fabulous BF-J, the International Woman of Mystery, I just started listening to this Audible book. If you're a fan of "Gosford Park" (the same screenwriter penned this book) & the comedy of manners genre like I am, this is fantastic so far.

Ok, ladies and gentlemen, have at it - what am I missing? What's the fin-de-2008 read I simply must put in my Alibris cart? Yes, yes - in actual fact, I'm extremely open to titles not involving England, smelling salts, or weekends horsing around some country estate, although surely those things aren't a negative?

Important, Special Note to "Laris Pilton" via Secretary Paulson

Pretty Headquarters
One Snark Avenue
Principality of Monaco, Via Austin, Texas


December 11, 2008

Department of the Treasury
Attn.: Secretary Henry Paulson
1600 Lame Duck Avenue NW
Washington, D.C. 20500

Dear Secretary Paulson:

This whole recession thing has proved a bit of a bother, no? It must be said, however, that with all of these economic troubles have come some incredible opportunities of the retail persuasion - for those fortunate enough to still be able to shop, that is. I am certain that your geeeeeeenius fiscal policies have had a large hand in that - we won't get into them here since they surely involve M-A-T-H, and my grandmother wouldn't approve of our talking about P-O-L-I-T-I-C-S either - but I thank you nonetheless.

Shopping bonanzas aside, We do recognize that Congress and the like have decided that the economy is in ruins as evidenced by certain businesses, such as the "Big Three" American car manufacturers, requiring bailout a la taxpayer dollars. Being a, you know, taxpayer myself, I propose an even bigger sign that our nation's economy is in peril:

When our nation's fairies are forced to turn tricks, as is evidenced by this pleather-clad wonder here, it's clear our country is in crisis. Moreover, when She Who Shall Not Be Named (name rhymes with "Laris Pilton") is able to launch not one, not two, but FIVE successful perfume lines - FIVE - such as this most recent "Fairy Dust" one, we're in a pickle that no 3-1 ARM mortgage alone caused.

Hence, as an alternative or (at least) supplement to the proposed economic bailouts, Secretary Paulson, might I suggest that those who voluntarily spent actual US Dollars on any one of the five (FIVE) SWSNBN scents be, ahem, asked to fork over an equal amount of cold hard cash to our national government - after they read and repeat This Blog's Mission Statement 50 times on a chalkboard, that is? Because automobile manufacturers may come and go, but I fear this multi-scented menace may haunt us forever . . .

Smootches,

Miss Legallyblondemel
Pretty HQ

PS - We may be willing to overlook some of this if you could just arrange a wee meetup with the White House Social Secretary and/or Fantasy GBF Tim Gunn. Just saying.

From Tory to Target, A Budget Look

Just back from a successful Junior League meeting in which the controversial topic of Miss Posh didn't come up event once, unfortunately. Absent such thought-provoking subject matter, I dedicated myself to trying to make friends here in town, or as my BF-EM so elegantly puts it, "hitting on the Ladies of the League."

In any event, I figure it's been at least 5 minutes since we've done a Target shopping round-up, and with the holidays coming up and the economy tanking and tigers and bears oh my, blah blah, we all could use some budget-friendly holiday attire ideas. After all, I'm all about being Prettier Than Everyone Else, not Less Financially Responsible Than Everyone Else.

So imagine my delight upon entering Target on one of my daily occasional visits and seeing a few pieces clearly, ahem, inspired by some festive holiday Tory Burch and J. Crew pieces I've been intrigued by but not been able to / willing to justify. The Target Limited Edition collection in particular is such a welcome relief after that Sigerson Morrison / Elf Attire debacle we talked about here.

Here is the fancy-pants TB / J. Crew version of the object o' my holiday party frock eye (which looks somewhat garbage-bag esque in photos, but is gorge in person) & shoes:

(Credit: Tory Burch)

Tough to see in this photo, so just take my word for it that this is lovelier in person. Perhaps not $995 lovelier (gaah!), but nice nonetheless.

(Credit: Tory Burch)

Love the jewel details. Hate hate hatey hate the $850 price.

(Credit: J. Crew)

Remeber these J. Crew Gabrielle beauties? Love these both in the heel and flat editions.

And now for the Target version . . . bear in mind the legendary horribilityness of the Target website and web photography. Again, these are so cute in person:

(Credit: Target)

In person, this is a yummy brocade shift with a great, 60s-ish neckline. And:

(Credit: Target)

OK, so it isn't identical to the Tory, but it also isn't (gulp) $850. And finally:


(Credit: Target)

(Credit: Target)

A nice twist on both the J. Crew and the usual Revas.

Target, I'm so glad we're friends again. Now if only I didn't have those pesky Christmas presents to buy for, you know, other people . . .

Pretty Ice Princess - Victoria Beckham???

Hello again! Please forgive me my blog absence, sweets. I've been off doing my best impersonation of a dutiful housewife, including but not limited to Christmas shopping, decking the halls, and pretending to ignore the outrageous sums the Anonymous Husband spent Ebaying AC/DC tickets, although the latter may prove a useful weapon in my ongoing Macbook crusade. Ahem. In any event, I'm back - or "Back in Black" as the aforementioned band might put it . . .

Anywhoooo, as you might imagine, We here at the Pretty have devoted no small amount of time and energy into the study of what makes an cultural icon of our most favorite flavor, the Ice Princess. It would be easy to merely group together the most famous of the group based on outward appearances alone - Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis (obvs), Princess Grace (obvs obvs), January Jones when in "Mad Men" character, etc. - but surely the question merits a less superficial take. Pets, it isn't often that you'll find me advocating a less superficial approach to anything, so I hereby accept your polite applause and suggest the following as rules in addition to the physical obvious which we should be using in our evaluations:

1) Curiosity about the world, whether it be via travel (according to one's means, of course), keeping up with current events, etc.;
2) Education, whether it be formal or an ongoing personal process of reading and learning;
3) Charitable involvement, again according to one' s abilities and interests;
4) Demurely, deceptively delicate demeanor and deportment (and, apparently, alliteration and assonance);
5) Unapologetic affection for natural glamour, both in one's appearance and one's surroundings; and
6) A private sense of superiority based upon knowledge of #1-5 above, evidenced only by an ever-so-slightly icy and sly smile.

So as a student of the genre, I was quite intrigued to stumble across this Harper's Bazaar feature on Mrs. Beckham herself, in which she explains the machinery behind the "icon" (Pretty Parentheses added) that is Posh:

(credit: Harper's Bazaar via People Magazine)

I won't spoil the fun of reading this yourself, but for those of you wanting an abridged version, here for your delectation are Mrs. Beckham's additions to the Ice Princess Lexicon:

- (when asked about those infamous no-heel boots she recently wore): "Oh, c'mon, they're not that hard to walk in . . . you have to go to a sex shop to get this spray to polish them."

(credit: Daily Mail)

I'm thinking the key accessory here is less the harlot-y non-heels, and more the Arm Charm (hideous pinstripes notwithstanding), don't you?

- (when asked how she prepares for events): "I go into hair and makeup, and I turn into 'Victoria Beckham.'

- (when asked about running out to do errands): "If I go to the supermarket looking like sh-t, that affects my work. I am selling an image."

This all seems, I dunno, a bit heavy on the external, "branding" business, and less concerned about the other stuff that makes a legend . . . what do you think? Have I read too much Jane Austen - wait, don't answer that - such that I expect my heroines to be "accomplished" along the lines of what we discussed above, or is pop culture indeed steering us in the wrong, PVC-clad direction?

ETA: I hope I didn't imply that my jury has definitively voted on Posh per se. Unlike She Who Shall Not Be Named (name rhymes with "Laris Pilton"), I'm confident that Victoria is in on the joke, she has a few undeniably fabulous, non-PVC items in her closet, and I won't deny that she is . . . something. It's the idea that she's an ICON with a capital "i" that I'm not quite comfortable with yet. Let the debates continue!

One of These Things is Not Like the Other Things

Amongst the finer bits of being a Smug Married is having someone who is morally and legally obligated to attend stuff with you. There are certainly many times in which I prefer to go it alone - shopping & eating chocolate chip cookies swiftly come to mind - but for the average party or concert, it's lovely to have a nice Arm Charm. Whether or not he or she likes it.

Along these lines, I was just going over my upcoming non-sports-related** entertainment schedule. We're all for expanding our cultural horizons here at the Pretty, but . . . but . . . let's just see if you can pick out which event was selected by the Anonymous Husband:
**Sports-related is necessarily disqualified because ALL 5,000,021 of those things are exactly like the other, in that the AH selected them.

(credit: Overstock.com)

(credit: Broadway Theater League)

(credit: Steven Barclay Agency)

(credit: Barnes & Noble)

(Credit: CaseMusic.org)

Not to be gauche and discuss money, but - bonus points if you can tell me which tickets are the much, much, MUCH more expensive . . .

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

And a big, smootchy Thank You for your fabulous answers to my "What do I want to be when I grow up?" question! I had such a wonderful time reading your answers; as ever, you dolls impress me with your thoughtful and entertaining insights. And that's not just the merlot talking. Promise.

When I Grow Up . . .

Operation Christmas was a bit of an uphill battle today thanks to my ever-glamorous professional life and some long hours put in at the Junior League. However, armed with my trademark sense of perseverance as well as my kind friend, Coppola Merlot, I've happily distracted myself by pondering that question that was so enticing when we were six - what do I want to be when I grow up (aside from Princess Grace, obvs)?

Remember back when any profession seemed possible? I think we all had a stint at some point of imagining ourselves as President, a veterinarian, an astronaut, or a professional cookie dough tester - simultaneously, no less. No, just me? In any event - aside from, you know, helping people and stuff, I bring you my professional aspirations . . .

Pretty's Top 5 List of Fantasy Jobs, December 2008 Edition

1) Fug Girl (as in a writer, not a target of their multi-splendored wrath)
2) Anna Wintour, she of the fierce bob and inevitably chic sample closet

(credit: Stephen Chernin/AP via The Guardian)

Why so grumpy, sweets, when surely a vintage Birkin is available at the snap of your deliciously cold, unfeeling fingers?

3) Witty and wise advice columnist a la Carolyn Hax
4) International Woman of Mystery and/or Secretary of State
5) Fairy Princess

I'm off to research some merlot Target goodies for you . . . in the meantime, what do YOU want to be when you grow up?

A Grinch's Confession - Holiday Decor

Tonight I must confess something to you . . . I do not maintain this icily cool and elegant exterior year round. Come the day after Thanksgiving, my cold, unfeeling heart cracks just enough to get demonstrably excited about buying gifts, decorating the Pretty HQ, and spiking the eggnog. I outright adore midnight service on Christmas Eve and sending those Christmas cards you all helped me with a while back. Yes, for the month of December, I've known on occasion to be positively . . . cheerful.

However, as I emerged from my turkey coma this year, I struggled to get in the spirit of things, this being my first Christmas season without that late lover of LV herself, my dear grandmother. So this morning I decided to daintily grab this Christmas by the bells and, well, fake it till I make it. Shopping being one of Grandmother's approved hobbies, I set to adorning Pretty HQ with some much needed holiday decor, and slowly the caffeine that old, familiar excitement started to creep in.

So let's take a peek at my Christmas bounty so far - surely the first in a series of boring you with holiday Prettiness - but first, my Rules of Holiday Decorating:

(1) My decorating style is random, er, fun. Colorful. Whatever strikes my festive fancy and seems like it can withstand children and champagne (not together, mind you. Gaah). More Clark Griswold, less Martha Stewart.

(2) As I e-commented to HRH Sippycups today - your chesticles may be fake and your hair color may be fake, but your Christmas tree may not. I will bear no opposition about this - if the tree does not shed and smell fabulous and entice your cat to climb up it at 3 am, I want no part of it.

Without further fuss, I bring you the best of today's Operation Christmas goodies:

(credit: Macy's)

(credit: Macy's)

Macy's! On sale! Exclamation point!!

Please forgive the splendiferous iPhone photography with this next Target find . . .


As ever, our friends at the big T have a delightful holiday setup; worth wading through to find the looks-expensive-but-aren't pieces like these.

(Credit: Barnes & Noble. Heaven.)

Because if I can't have Harry Connick Jr. gift wrapped under my mistletoe um, I mean, crooning to me in my living room, I may as well have this excellent Christmas CD on my iPod. Speaking of HCJ in the flesh - love you, Anonymous Husband! - he is on tour, and all swoon-age aside, is one of the best live acts I've ever seen. Incredibly talented, funny, and even more, er, charming live . . . what was I talking about again?

What am I missing on the Christmas cheer list, pets?

The Texas Chronices: Football Fashion

Hello, pets! Please forgive my long blog break. That wee respite enabled me to enjoy those most American of Thanksgiving traditions - testing my Citizens' waistband capacity (prognosis: Strech Kelly fit recommended), watching far too much football, spending an afternoon at Hooters with the Anonymous Husband, my in-laws, and my boss . . .

(credit: I kid you not, Hooters Gear)

Betcha didn't expect to see Hooters regalia here at the Pretty, no? That makes two of us.

All festive holiday, ahem, "hot wings" aside, I did stumble across some disturbing fashion finds while at the Texas-Texas A&M football game last Thanksgiving day. Fashionable friend S, who I like despite the fact that she has the Tory Burch boots I've been stalking but can no longer find in black, and I stood with our respective Anonymous Husbands after the game swilling beer and criticizing passersby - in other words, my average Thursday evening. In addition to other various & sundry crimes against couture, like S spotting the infamous football purse (as in a handbag made out of an actual ball) first viewed by SLynnRo at a prior game, we spied and cried over:

(credit: Gawker. And Beelzebub.)

I know, I know - there I go picking the low hanging fruit, right? Listen, dahlinks, this blog isn't named "I Pick Super Original and Brilliant Insights", but I digress . . . see anything basic missing from this picture, aside from a mirror? Let's go down the mental list from the top . . .

• Sweater? Check.
• Blazer (albeit scary shoulder-padded one)? Check
• La Lohan leggings? Check
• Cowboy boots? Check
  
• Pants? Oh, right . . . pants . . .
  

Yes, some poor student (not the one pictured, obvs, but you get the idea) was apparently soooooooooo distraught about A&M's loss that she ripped her trousers asunder and despondently wandered about the Texas campus in a (short-ish) t-shirt, leggings, and cowboy boots alone. Or was she aggrieved because she'd forgotten her circa 1982 blazer and sweater, thus leaving her full Arsenal out on full display? Are the cowboy boots, with their modest ankle coverage and Texas heritage, meant to offset the revelation of the rear?

Bottom line, sweets - college football may be its own religion around these parts, but not one that requires sacrificing one's actual pants. Or spending any more Saturday afternoons at the friendly neighborhood wings-n-ladybits joints, I hope . . .